Just “Choose” To Be Happy? WHAT??

Let me tell you… when you are feeling sad, depressed, lonely, abandoned, insecure, anxiety, or just generally negative in any way - nothing is more nauseating and unhelpful than having some bright eyed cheerleader-type person preach to you “Just choose to be happy!” UGH! Like it’s a freakin’on-off switch? Are they saying I WANT to feel this way? You just want to slap them! Going through my own rough times, I’ve heard this phrase so much and people honestly feel they are being helpful when they say it. Some people cannot sit with you in your pain so they want to just give you a nice little catch phrase and then they can go off on their merry way feeling good about themselves in that “they tried” and you are just a miserable-old-bat-that-just-wants-to-be-miserable-no-matter-what. I cannot think of a more un-helpful phrase than “Just choose to be happy".

Allow me to give you my interpretation of this phrase that actually might be helpful to you, although I do not have a replacement catch-phrase that I can throw at you, so sorry about that.  When you are caught in that spiral of miserable feelings, there is a point where you realize “Wow, I’m feeling pretty miserable and I’m having a lot of miserable thoughts. I would like to stop thinking/feeling this way.” At this point when you realize this, no matter how big or small you need to choose something that makes you happy or as some people say“raise your vibrations”. Maybe it’s looking at a funny or cute youtube.com video, maybe it’s talking to a friend, maybe it’s watching cartoons, maybe it’s going to the batting cage and hitting few out of the park? It doesn’t matter what it is as long as it puts a smile on your face. Whatever makes you happy or at least think a happy thought, just do it! You can build on that!

To explain it a little better, imagine a raging river flowing strong in one direction. It could be a raging river of unhappiness, anxiety, frustration, etc or all the above. But with every happy thought (which can be represented by a single drop of water) going in the opposite direction, you can actually change the direction of this massive river if you have enough thoughts (or water drops) going in the other direction. I can tell you that it IS possible and I have done it. A word of caution though, if you are at a point though that every thought in your day is miserable and absolutely nothing makes you happy that you know of, then you may need to seek professional help. It may even require medication at first to help stop those spiraling downward thoughts so you can actually start thinking of happy things even if it is only starts as one happy second of the day.  It may start as a single thought, then two, then three, then you start to realize you were happy for a whole 5 minutes! Then maybe the next day/week you realize you were happy for a whole 30 minutes! Then maybe the next month you were happy half the day! It only grows from there.

It is helpful to start by making healthy choices and I do not only mean diet and exercise. Help yourself to look good, feel good, and be good.  Surround yourself with positive people (or just get rid of the negative ones, haha).  If the “voices in your head” are saying nothing but horribly negative things, maybe download some helpful podcasts, audiobooks, or even positive subliminal messages with relaxing music? This way you can listen to other voices than the ones in your head and it least the ones you download are positive!  Another option, every time you see a funny video or post, keep the link in a "For emergency" file for whenever you need a smile or a laugh.  The point is, do whatever works for you to move towards things that make you think happy thoughts.

There is a famous inspirational saying “Every journey begins with a single step” but this can also be modified to “Happiness begins with a single happy thought”.  Awareness is the key so ….Just Choose Happy Thoughts!

Want to slap me yet? LOL!

P.S - Want to start?  Let me share something that always makes me laugh:  http://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/the-30-most-hilarious-autocorrect-struggles-ever#.drKyerJMma

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